Beth Moore & blogging

What an amazing speaker that woman is!! I know, I know, she is just a woman. Just a human. Imperfect, just like me. But there is something about the way in which she communicates her passion for Jesus that just stirs my soul.

I wrote once before about how for a long time I was skeptical of the whole Beth Moore craze. I would her women rave about her and smugly think to myself "why do people worship her? People should worship Jesus, not Beth Moore."

Let me tell you, she feels that way too!!

She is always praying "Lord, help me not to get in the way!" and always commenting on how she is "the least of you". And the thing that impressed me most about her conference last weekend, was how much she did not want any glory. There was never any introduction "and here comes Beth Moore!!!!" or anything like that. We would be singing, and then just all of a sudden she would appear on stage and start talking, leaving no room for applause. And the same for when she and her team left the stage, even for the final time on Saturday afternoon, they just snuck off stage quietly while we were worshiping... gone.

That, to me, is a woman who does not want any glory.

The theme of the weekend was pretty much on crucifying our egos, and letting Christ be formed in us. To be honest, when she first started talking about our egos on Friday night I was a little disappointed...

My issues tend to be more low self-esteem than big ego.

Or so I thought.

Turns out, through the scenario's and examples that she gave, I realized my ego is pretty decent sized.

Ginormous, actually.

The things I feel I am due, or the ways in which I feel I am wronged, or the times in which I think I know what would be better and try to "advise" the Lord....oh yeah, big ol' ego!!

It was very humbling. But in a really good way.

I left with a sense of peace, humility, and a trust in His plan for me... and a desire to try to get in the way of that plan less =)


And now to the "blogging" part...

One of the things that I felt hit me square between the eyes was when she was talking about marriage, and how hard it can be sometimes. She was going on about relationships and nurturing them... when all of a sudden she says "...and sisters, I say this with love, put down your computers. I see so many women spending countless hours on their computers investing time in relationships with people they hardly know, while the person they should be nurturing a relationship with is right there next to them."

Ummm....who, me??

Like I said, square between the eyes. There are days when I can spend the entire evening -from after dinner until bedtime - online. You all are just so fun and interesting =)

Last term when David worked evenings, I was alone every evening and had plenty of time to read blogs and blog myself. But this Spring term, he is home, every evening, and he deserves my attention.

I felt a huge conviction about this last weekend. Not guilt, it was just an attention getter for me. My marriage isn't perfect, and what marriage couldn't use a little more dedication, really??? And other things...there really is no excuse for me to be behind on my Bible Study, or time with the Lord, and yet caught up on blogs.

I don't say that to instill guilt or convict ANYONE else, this is just what the Lord has asked of me.

I hope you hear my heart...I am not AT ALL trying to say blogging is a relationship-destroyer. In fact, it has helped me in SO many ways, in that it's been a wonderful outlet for me, and a great place for me to come and feel safe to express my emotions, record my days for preserving memories, etc. And most important, I have met some of the neatest friends here! And I say this with my whole heart, I really do love you ladies!!!

I just feel the Lord whispering on my soul to spend less time investing in it.

And I have been trying to obey His direction regarding this during the past week, and as a result am catching up on my blog friends previous weeks posts today...and it is striking to me how many of you have posted something similar to this...I wonder what God is up to!?! He sure seems to be beckoning so many of us to be a little more still.

Peace be with you!!!